Hello everyone. I started writing this post last week, but to say things got in the way would be an understatement. My fiancé is dealing with the remnants of shingles, which has meant the loss of his arm, as it’s too painful to use it (where the outbreak mainly occurred). So, I’ve been picking up the slack, in as much as possible. In fact, the small amount I have been able to do; cook, wash dishes and laundry, drive, has been too much, apparently, and my body is crashing. Hard.
I went to my wonder physio and she confirmed that the crunch that had started under my knee was tendinopathy from all the physical stress of moving to an apartment up four flights of stairs without any movers. She asked how my back was, seeming to expect my reply telling her that it was cramping up all the time like crazy, and to make matters short, it’s due to my hips, which I can testify feel like they’re sliding all over the place when I attempt to walk down stairs (because walk wouldn’t really be the word…more like wobble from side to side and skip-drop down each step while holding onto the wall for dear life). Anyway, as always, it’s a domino effect and my hands and wrists are pinging like crazy, from the seizing up in my shoulders I suppose, and lack of muscle strength all over.
In the case of EDS, hypermobile at least, it turns out that muscles atrophy much faster than the normal person. For example, if I don’t do my exercises every single day, and at the very least, every other day, it’s almost as if my muscles melt, whereas it would usually take several weeks for other people. This is particularly true for me in my inner quads. They’re weak to begin with, as the outer quads ‘take over’ and pull my kneecaps to the side of their too-shallow sockets, hence all my knee problems and dislocations.
So, all of this has led to a pretty crummy outlook for me, at the moment. I know I’ll be back up and annoying Boh soon, but when I’m so exhausted and in pain that I can barely get a word out, it feels like the future doesn’t look so bright. I’ve had to say goodbye to my hour-long (low intensity) stationary bike rides, which I quite enjoy, and goodbye to any physio, apart from 5 mini squats, twice a day, which is endlessly frustrating, because I felt that things were finally starting to seem doable. That I was without so much pain, according to the physio though, was dangerous, as what I would consider discomfort is considerable pain for most people, but since I’ve had such a long and difficult recovery from surgery, I’ve gotten used to daily pain. Now that it’s lessening, it’s easy to overdo it with exercise or physical activity in general like walking or cleaning, because I’ve basically forgotten what it’s like not to feel pain for every movement. Hence the tendinopathy.
Anyway, I thought I should update and get it all out here. I haven’t been sleeping very well and have started having my long vivid dreams again, where I’m conscious and don’t feel fully asleep the whole night, so I’m very tired and honestly, probably a bit snappy at the moment. I also have to sort out food, since it’s still touch and go on what affects me and how, especially now I can’t exercise. So there’s a lot to think about constantly, and manage. But! Have computer, will write, albeit through a fog of fatigue and crabbiness.
If you’re still reading through my update of complaints, I appreciate it. Really, thank you, dear reader. I will try to finish some other posts that are actually of substance as soon as I can.
Love Lo xo